Posted by khian at 01:00 AM on February 2, 2006 in .
Posted by khian at 11:31 AM on February 3, 2006 in .
I just finished customizing my new laptop..going to get it in 2 weeks time..and i'm not really in the mood for blogging ANYMORE..so i guess...
BYE PEOPLE...
Posted by khian at 12:07 AM on February 4, 2006 in .
Mel reckons that i should insert more pictures in my blog..
So,coz i've nothing to blog about..so..i'll just have to put in pictures for viewing pleasure..Anyway,i was at Yi fang's for her farewell party and i was late..reached there for 30 minutes and everyone had to leave..so took this picture..
Then today,we went out to Jusco to yumcha..and i was late again..coz got visitors last minute...
ahh..how much we have changed..or at least,it's just me alone..
*back when i was still in highschool..----
Mel is so right...i don't have to type much..and u guys can probably understand how i feel...=)
Posted by khian at 12:34 PM on February 4, 2006 in .
i just realised that i only look good in certain angles...
cis..
michelle lee and I...finally..after so long..
puiyeen,michelle and I...taken when i was not ready..the last picture we took was wayyyyy back during yeesan's party...
Spot the difference?..hahha....
this picture...erm...michelle lee kept persuading me to take..haha..so chik chak la...
so,...michelle,next gathering..when ah?..
YOU,michelle lee...officially appointed as the organizer for all meetings and gatherings for us,alright?...NO monthly salary..but there will be smiles for you at the end of the day...
Posted by khian at 01:29 AM on February 5, 2006 in .
will be packing my bags...going back to Toronto Tronoh...(it's just a joke,shared among UTP students)..so..it'll be another 2 weeks before i come home again..to watch this year's ACS play..,directed by KARMUN,with the assistance of DAHINESWARI..and guess what..i still don't know what the title of the play is..Ivan told me he couldn't make it..coz he has no car...so,i'm left with an extra rm20 ticket..erm..anyone care to accompany me?
assignment due on MOnday...quiz next week..and i still haven't finished studying...
erm..yen chiew's friend,who happens to be in UTP..is doing 1st year,2nd sem..he's kinda cute..i wonder whether he's attached...hehe..goh?.,..need your help....
haha..
Posted by khian at 09:30 PM on February 6, 2006 in .
Posted by khian at 03:58 PM on February 7, 2006 in .
I hate being 'visited' every month..What is wrong with my body system?!!!..Why must IT come every time of the month?..can't IT do an annual visit at least?...like once in 3 years or 10 years..or just don't blardy come at all?!!!!!!...i hate being UNWANTED visitors..sob..sob..i don't care whether it's chinese new year now..all what sorts of holiday seasons..can't i just be left alone?!!!hmmph!!!....now,my whole body is aching..and i blardy hell need some rest..but i've been running all around the uni today..attending lectures..and running to the comp lab,printing all my lecture notes and tutorial questions..cis...why must it come on this particular freaking busy week..?!!can't we at least choose when we want 'visitors'?..or can't they be more courteous..and give me a call before coming?..ish..at least let me know mar..so..i can't ponteng lectures mar..adoi!...
anyway..i'm now in the computer lab now..having a great time printing all my notes..i need to get this done by end of this week..coz next week,the 1st quiz for chemistry and physics is on..and hell..i don't even understand a single thing yet..burn midnight oil la i guess..
hmm..will be back this friday..coz lectures are all cancelled due to Thaipusam..hahah..another holiday for me!!...so..will be coming back to ipoh,to see Adeline..coz she'll be leaving to Australia on the 15th..and yes,probably will be meeting MP too..coz Adeline kept insisting that i should meet MP at least before leaving..sigh..to tell u guys the truth,i'm kinda scared meeting MP..i have no idea what to say to MP when we meet..don't know whether i should keep quiet or just fake myself being happy right now..sigh..life's a bitch!...
i'm listening to a mandarin song now..it goes something like this..(translated version..)..the meaning of the song...
"last night,there was a sudden rain,then let me saw you in my dreams..i was in a place..deserted area,..woe..now i want to hold u tight..
there was once i heard from a friend about your news,my heart was beating very fast..
broke up for 2 years already but yet i still miss u..i didn't meet you for so long..i wonder where you are staying right now..there will be one day both of us will grow old,..so at least leave us some memories so that we can savour it in the future..."
darn...this is a very beautiful song...exactly how i'm feeling right now..sigh..sigh..hehe...i don't know what's this mandarin song called..coz my MP4 doesn't read chinese...erm..so..u people who are smart enough..translate translate..then..see whether get the song or not la..
FRIDAY..I'LL BE ON HOLIDAYS...!!LONG WEEKEND FOR ME LA!!....
(please pray that i don't break down anytime soon k...i tried to restrain myself from listening to that song repeatingly..but i wonder why it keeps repeating...)
darn...
having a headache..and yes,slight fever and bad sore throat..sob..i need some love to make it better...hmm....;(
Posted by khian at 02:17 PM on February 8, 2006 in .
am supposed to have class now..ICIS lab now..but the lab demonstrater is nowhere to be seen...dang!..and i'm not feeling so well..having fever now.and this morning,i woke up with cold sweat..and i was wet all over..i nearly fell from my bed..and then..i walked miserably to the bathroom..my head was heavy...and then..the visitor is going to stay for like another 6 days-i guess..so..my body was aching all over..plus the heat..my gosh..it's amazing i'm able to climb up 2 floors to get to this computer lab..anyway,the server is much faster here..prolly coz it runs on its own...i don't know..
i'm thinking whether i should be going home this weekend..i dare not tell my parents that i'm sick..just in case my dad rush down to see me...and i know he's rather busy...
will be having a very BUSY day tomorrow..2 labs:physics and chemistry..plus a few lectures...aararrggghh!!!.....
Posted by khian at 11:11 PM on February 8, 2006 in .
dear whom it concerned,
do you actually know the courtesy of blogging?if i've decided to use some other name to talk about someone,and i happened to tell you who it is..DO YOU HAVE TO ASK ME AGAIN ON MY PAGE ONLINE...?!!!! if i wanted to announce to the whole world,why would i want to use someother nick for that particular person?..why didn't i just post that particular's name?pardon me for saying this..but u are a total idiot..if i were to tell u the story,can't u just shut up and stop asking me questions?didn't i tell u earlier that i want to move on in my life...and helllooo...if u constantly pounding the issue on me..HOW AM I GOING TO FORGET AND MOVE ON????..thanks to you,everyone knows who i was talking about...THANK YOU VERY MUCH... and just because when someone doesn't voice out her anger..doesn't mean she's not ANGRY..so..can't u get a hint and .......................?...
*&%%&^%^$%#@$@@*&((&*^*^P(&*_*)(*^Y*&^&%$^$#%$#W$
pfft..i'm seriously pissed off right now..
Posted by khian at 11:56 AM on February 9, 2006 in .
feeling much better this morning..though the body temperature is still rather high..that idiot person text messaged me today,apologised for his mistakes..alright,i did accept his apology but no,i probably need more time to actually start talking to him again..guys can be so insensitive sometimes...sigh...
anyway,i'm having CALL lab now..so..i can update la..nothing much..except i have 3 lab sessions today..and the physics one..sigh..shall write more tonight i guess...
Posted by khian at 12:05 AM on February 10, 2006 in .
i have just been tagged by this orange carrot..asking me to write something which i have no idea...(psst..i know la..u are on hols..got nothing to do..can sit down,shake legs..write essays..but that doesn't mean every other people can do so too..hehe.)
I was asked to write a love story..in the honour of Valentine's Day..so here goes..:-
Yong and Jun have never met each other before.They both came from different schools,but yet the schools are just a stone's throw apart. They didn't know the existance of one another, but they didn't know that they were just near to each other: They attended the same tuition class..and Jun happens to sit just a row behind Yong. Still they fail to know the existance of one another. A year has passed by and nope,they still didn't know one another.
One day,as Yong was fooling around with his friends, he saw this beautiful girl who walks in the class(tuition class) that captured his attention. The girl in front of him was someone different,someone beautiful,someone new.Yong looked into the girl's eyes and smiled.The girl responded. Yong was excited. Since that day, Yong couldn't wait to attend tuition classes and would actually go there as early as 30 minutes earlier,just so to get a good place,just to be able to see this beautiful girl. At this point,Yong still didn't dare to talk to that girl,fearing that the girl would be scared of him,Moreover,such a beautiful girl,must be taken by someone by then. However, the girl's friend told Yong that the girl was not taken by anyone,in fact,she was still single then.Yong was exhilirated and decided to make a move.Take note that by now,Yong still doesn't know this girl's name.Yong went to a lot of trouble,just to get the girl's cellphone number and it took him a lot of courage to actually pick up the phone to text message her. So,one evening,Yong decided to text messaged her and talked to this girl. They chatted through text messages and finally,Yong met Jun.From that day onwards, there were constant messages and plenty of phone calls from both parties.
To cut the story short,after being friends for 4 months,they decided to bring the relationship to the next level,and they were soon dating.Though belonging to a different school,yet Yong never fret and would walked the distance,just to catch a glimpse of Jun.They went for lunches and yes,sometimes,they met each other during tuition hours. In the day,when they thought of each other,they would write short notes in papers and just passed it to the other party when they meet. They made a point that every Thursday would be the day for them to be together and they would walked,hand in hand,to the nearest mall or just a cafe to have lunch together. There was one day,when Yong and Jun were walking to the mall,the sky turned dark and rain came falling hard.They frantically looked for shade and when they were under a roof,they were both drenched.Yong quickly wiped the water from Jun's face and tried to dry her up with his bare hands,fearing that Jun will catch a cold later.Whereas Jun was getting tissue from her pocket but there was only one piece left.Jun took the last piece and instead of wiping herself dry,she used it and wiped Yong.Yong looked into Jun's eyes,hoping that the world would freeze at that moment because he knew he wants no one else but just Jun to spend his life with.So,to make Jun warmer,Yong decided to hug Jun tightly,standing by the staircase,waiting for the rain to stop but yet,at the same time,wishing that he didn't have to let her go forever.
Every certain afternoon,before tuition starts,Yong and Jun would take the cab back to Jun's place and spend some time at her place,waiting for the class to begin.It's during that time,both of them spend a lot of time,talking to one another,appreciating time together. There was once,when Yong fell sick and couldn't get out from the bed.Jun made him her speciality: lemon+honey drink and send it to him.Upon drinking that,He was cured.Call it miracle,call it impossible but that must have been the power of love.
Unfortunately,nothing can be happy forever.Somehow,things get bad at times.There were many times when both of them argued.Yong would scold Jun for something which was not her fault and let his anger on her.Jun didn't retaliate but instead,just endure and keep her feelings inside.There were many times when they decided to give up on the relationship but yet,both of them somehow wasn't able to forget one another and got back into track again.Whenever Yong scolded Jun for no reason,Jun would have taken a knife and cut herself deeply,to prove to Yong that she loves him a lot and wouldn't want them to be apart.Yong knew then that God were just testing their faith in their relationship and they went back together.Soon,Jun's parents found out about them.Her parents stopped them from seeing each other.Drastic measures were taken to prevent them from communicating to each other.Jun's cellphone was taken away,she was not allowed to see anyone,to use the phone and was to go straight home after school.She was not allowed anywhere but to tuition classes and the school.So this made things harder for both of them.The only time they could meet each other was during tuition classes,which was just a merely 2 hours once,and only for 4 days a week.But yet,they treasured the time more.Though it was short,but yet,they felt happy just being with the presence of one another.
After graduating from high school,both of them were forced to be seperated because Jun had to leave the country to furthur her studies,but Yong was staying back in his own country. Both of them promised to spend time talking to each other on the phone at least once a week,or perhaps through the internet. It was hard for both parties to cope in a long distance relationship,but yet no matter how hard they struggle,they tried very hard to maintain their relationship.4 months has passed after Jun went abroad and then one day,she decided to come back for a holiday.Yong and Jun spend a hell lot of time being together and when it came to the day they were forced to leave the arms of one another again,they cried silently inside.
Being in many thunderstorms,they thought they could endure the pain and perhaps,last till the day they grow old together and die,But things started to change.Jun felt lonely,being alone in a country with none of her family members and she told Yong one day that she wanted to be with this guy.She has fallen for a new guy and she asked for a break up.Upon hearing this,Yong's heart was crashed to smithereens and could not say a word.He was devastated.Speechless and it was as if the whole world was coming down on him.He wanted to beg Jun to stay by his side,He wanted to tell that she meant everything to him,and he couldn't live without her but no,instead his ego took over,and at that moment,he agreed to let her go.
The next day itself,Yong regretted and text messaged Jun.He pleaded for a second chance and asked Jun to forgive him but yet,Jun was firm with her decision and nothing was going to change a mind.
2 weeks after the break up,Jun was with this other guy,happily being together.Yong was left with no one but himself.He became an alcoholic and drank to his sorrow. He took sleeping pills every night just to get himself to sleep and the next day,he would be drinking again.The viscious cycle continues everyday.There were a couple of times when he unconsciously cut himself,hoping that God would take his life and end his misery,but no,God didn't hear his prayers.Instead,God gave him the strength to carry on living,giving him hope everyday,whispering to his ears that he can live for himself instead.He met with a group of friends who encouraged him throughout his jouney of pain.He finally recovered.Slowly but yet He was moving on.
Done!my story is done..
TAGGING...mel,lili,yeesan,michelle and...urm...yiling?
Posted by khian at 12:29 AM on February 10, 2006 in .
Posted by khian at 03:23 PM on February 10, 2006 in .
~it's great to finally see someone after such a long time..
seeing MP smile brought me an inner sense of satisfaction.i love seeing MP smiled and laughed..we went out together today for breakfast with Ade and there were a slight feeling of uneaziness when we first met.I didn't talk much coz i was so afraid that i would break down.However,as time passed by,I was back to my normal self,making a fool out of myself..talking to MP like how we used to be..and man...i'm so freaking afraid that i'll break down tonight..sob..having my fingers crossed that it won't happen..because then,i'll put all the blame on Ade because she suggested us to meet..We took pictures at the photobooth..and we had a great time customizing the pictures,though i told them that i didn't need any customizing coz i'm already nice and me,myself can make the pictures look nice.MP drove me home after that..though i wanted to make the moment last longer,but MP was busy or she just wanted me to get off the car that instance..i don't know..but it was certainly good to be able to see the person u love most again..,though MP did mention about the other half here and there..and it actually breaks my heart to hear that..but then,i did very well in controlling myself..tried not to show my emotions..but how well i did in hiding my feelings..i really have no idea...MP put the arms around me today..and i so wanted to do the same..but i was afraid that MP would mind..so i didn't..but it felt so good..it was as if time was turned back..haha..but YES,people..i know it hadn't..*slapping myself back into reality*..but one thing is for sure..i enjoyed myself today...with Adeline...with MP and being 'together' with close to MP...i'm gonna miss MP now..sob...
MP said i grew F-A-T-T-E-R.DARN...
...i tot life was simple for me...
i had my dad,my mum and my bro...
i wished i would had more attention from my parents..
i wished my brother never exist..(that's another story)
BUT now..as i grew older...
I wanted to be loved..to love..
i want my love to be reciprocated..
I want to be a giver as well as the taker..
i gave u everything i have...EVERYTHING that u asked for..
i tried to fulfil your every dream..your every requests...
I tried to become the person of your dreams..
..the person you want me to be...
...instead,i was shunned...
You kicked me away when you wanted a new life..
Where were the sweet words you once promised me?
The 'I Love You's, 'I Miss You's, 'I can't live without You's'?
I tried recalling them...but were they just merely words?
WOrds that you utter just to keep me happy and satisfied?
Where are the hugs and kisses you gave me when we were together?
Where did all of these go?
You left me alone,..in search of a new beginning...
BUT what about me?what about me who's struggling to keep my life in order?
The lies that you promised...it's still ringing in my head..
Why?
I asked God the reason for so many times..but all of my questions were unanswered..
Am i supposed to find the answers myself?
Or wait for HIM to tell me?
Posted by khian at 03:44 PM on February 10, 2006 in .
was talking to cs,a friend of mine..who shares the same problem as I have..
our conversation:-
Me: i wonder why i kept having this heavy feeling in me..
CS: i know what u mean..i have that all the time..
Me: Must be weird eh?..i feel weird myself too..i wonder where the feelings came from.
CS: i thought u said u met up with MP today?that must be the reason.
Me: Yeah..i guess so...the only explanation.
CS: i know u will und how it feels.i felt the same way too myself.
Me: Life's a bitch u know..When you are in love and together,things are so happy,But when u are already broken up,the pain is twice of u felt.
Cs: yes..i get what u mean..life sucks..
Me: I wished we never met before.Life would be easier.
CS: ....(i forgot what she wrote).
The feeling of being sucked into a deep black hole is shared by this 2 friends of mine..names are NOT to be mentioned..but it's certainly comforting to know that i'm not the only one in this.Thanks guys for being there always..Life goes on for me..and also to u guys..k?let's get out from the black hole..!
Posted by khian at 01:06 AM on February 11, 2006 in .
was supposed to be a happy night for my and my family..we decided to have dinner at YUM YUM peacefully,having the last yeesang meal together.Half way of meal,Ahtan-my tuition teacher who lives opposite my place called.i was surprised and shocked but i answered it anyway.
ahtan: angkhian ah..
me: yes,sir?anything?
ahtan: i think your house got broken in la..where are u?
me: huh?(panicking)..
ahtan: where are u?
me: out.i'll be coming back.Can u see what's there or not?help me please.thank you.
ahtan: no problem.
so..i told my dad about the alarming news.Dad gave me a look,asked me whether i was joking and i reaffirmed that i was not.So,the whole family got panic and rushed home.I did the driving as dad's heart was week and i knew he wasn't in a good shape to drive.So i took over the wheel and drove as fast as i could.At the same time,dad was worried about my new laptop that was just here for 1 day..and mum was worried about the bottles of liqour in the cupboard and bro was worried that he couldn't make it on time for the NBA match.KNNCCB
so when i finally reached home,i saw ahtan's parents standing outside,looking from afar..and the my next door neighbour was waiting outside for us to come back.I saw our house light being turned off and i thought that was weird coz i remember it was switched on before we left the house and when i arrived the front gate..i saw another weird thing,our clothes hanger was pushed to the front,to cover the entrance.My gawd..I saw my slide door opened widely..and the glass door was opened too..and i can see some cracked glass on the ground.Shit!...
My neighbour came over..told us that she was out with the family and when she arrived home,she felt weird coz she saw our porch light off..coz usually the whole street,only my house will be the brightest,so she decided to check lor..and then she saw the door wide opened.Plus our clothes hanger was pushed to cover the entrance which was lagi weird coz usually we put it on the other side.She saw our slide door wide opened but also the porch lights were off.She suspected of burglary.She ran across to Ahtan's place,asked him to contact me coz she doesn't know how to contact my parents..which explains why ahtan called me at the 1st place.
My dad walked into the house and examined it.The whole house was topsy-turvy..papers were everywhere..all the things were in a mess!i quickly rushed into my room and saw papers everywhere.MY table was in a mess..my drawers were turned over and my letters and documents were all thrown on the floor.The letters that MP has written to me was everywhere.I went straight to my laptop and saw the bag there.I examined inside and saw that it was still there.Phew!Check for my digicam..on my table..my wallet with a couple of hundreds..there!...good..nothing was missing..BUT when i searched for my dad's laptop..the one that i was using...oh god..it was nowhere near the place i left it.Shit..i asked my dad whether he has taken it back..he shook his head..Shit!!...one gone.
Next,my parents' room..needless for me to say..all the drawers were lying on the floor and the bed.My mum's wardrobe was empty and the things were lying on the floor.My mum's dressing table were empty..obviously things were on the floor.My bro's room...was not in a mess..but things were missing.The display case in the living room...where all the bottles of liqour were displayed there...Empty..not even a speck of dust...Shit..KNNCCB...MCB..whatever la..everything was gone..there goes the bottles of liqour..now what to serve the guests on my wedding dinner???!!
My mum called my aunties and uncles to come..They came..and before that..the police officers were here..But they couldn't do much..just walked around..cakap-cakap a bit...and that's it!..may as well don't have to come la like tat..my aunties and uncles came..asked around..asked what's gone..told my parents that we were lucky that no one was at home..Imagine what will happen if we were at home when the burglars broke in..?..coz usually my bro will be the one at home,doing his work...so..he was lucky..
Things that were stolen:-
The rest has yet to be confirmed..damn...
Posted by khian at 03:37 PM on February 11, 2006 in .
it's a wonder when you are at your lowest point,you tend to think of the person who broke your heart severely before..and not the person who cares for you right now.
*sorry goh,for nearly banging your car last night.i was in a panic mood.
Posted by khian at 01:03 AM on February 12, 2006 in .
Valentine's Day is just around the corner..in fact,it's on Tuesday this year..14th February..i used to love this day..when all the lovey-dovey advertisements are being aired on the tv set and the radio stations..There would be romantic movies showed on the set..and there will be plenty of gimmick on the radio..that attract people to join some sort of 'on-air' singing competition with their partner..and u are the lucky winner..u get some sort of dinner for 2 in some posh diners..or 2 tickets to somewhere on the earth..and everytime i tuned in the radio and heard this kind of thing,i'll automatically switched the station till that station decides to have this little gimmick too..and the switch continues.
Somehow this year..i DREADED valentine's to come..in fact,i wish that it'll not come this year..How i wish i'm able to sleep through the day and wake up the next..For the past 2 years..i've been spending with someone that i love alot..: MP and this year..things have already changed.MP would probably be spending with the other half..in KL..and i'll probably be spending Valentine's in some mamak stall with my friends who are single..
*don't ask me what ivan has in mind k?coz i WILL NOT BE CELEBRATING this year...
i kept telling myself that i'm not ready to start a new relationship..but somehow i'm afraid to be alone.I tried giving myself a 2nd chance,Yet there are only lies..lies that are only there to satisfy me.Only me.Somehow,the whole day,i wasn't thinking about anything or anyone.But there was only one person in mind.
-MP-
i kept thinking how we spend the past 2 years of valentines day together.
Our 1st year..we didn't do anything special as MP's parents are strict so MP ahd to stay at home during the night.I remembered i bought MP a small notebook and in it,i wrote about how i feel for MP..how we got together and how we met..and include loads of pictures in it.The book is now with me..Maybe it wasn't really that important to MP afterall..2nd year..we couldn't spend it together again coz MP left for australia to furthur studies..and i was stuck in National Service Trainning..so the only thing i could do was to give MP a call.It took me a whole lot of trouble just to be able to get to a phone booth..at that time,we were not allowed to use the handphone in camp and when i got hold of the public phone,i tried dialling MP's handphone number but couldn't get through a NATIONAL line..so..i was so desperated that i called MP's dad's cellphone instead.MP's mum picked the phone..and begun to question my identity..Kept asking me the reason of calling at that hour and kept telling me that it's expensive for them to receive a roaming call.I didn't care at that time..coz all i wanted to do at that time was to talk to my darling..MP..tell MP how much love i have...and to wish MP ..'happy valentine's day'..upon hearing MP's voice..how i wished i had the money to grab the next air flight over to australia..just to see MP..well,of course,we were still happily together at that time..
NOW,2006..MP will probably be with that asshole,spending time together in KL..
darn..and i'll be alone or lucky enough,will have my friends by my side during mamak sessions.
in a nutshell,i really loathe valentine's day.it's driving me nuts la with all the lovey and dovey stuffs and yet,i've no one to share with but MP...too bad MP is already attached..and MP's valentine's partner is no longer me..
Posted by khian at 10:59 PM on February 13, 2006 in .
Love is like a knife-cuts u from inside,slashes u deep down and leave u bleeding till u get dry..
ooooboy...quoted from the English Lecturer.with a few addition from khian..
MP'll be leaving to kl on the 14th to see the other half..ooboy...i'm so upset right now...and MP's not answering my sms..i wonder why..
i hate valentine's day..really a sucky tuesday for me this year..and guess what..my friends and i are going to J.E(Jarum Emas) to do countdown for Valentine's...
sakitnya jiwa dan ragaku...
Posted by khian at 12:56 AM on February 15, 2006 in .
it's 43 minutes after Valentine's Day and i decided to insert an entry about my day..after much dreading,alas,the day is gone..
hmm,let's start with Valentine's eve..that night..around 11 pm,someone came up with this idea to do some countdown in J.E(jARUM eMAS)-a mamak stall near UTP la..so,relunctantly,coz most of us were tired and there was abundant of work piling up waiting to be completed,..but we went in the end..so,there was carina,sharon,punchee,pinky,kenneth and me!..so,we set off around 11 something la,when i received a phone call from MP(wahliao..i was so excited okay..)then..we talked la..from my room door to the mamak stall la..for about 30 minutes or so..i was ovejoyed coz we finally did some catching up after so freaking long..and things were back like how it used to be..so..i had a very good time..so after doing the countdown thing,finished our drink and all the roti-roti..we headed back la..and while we were walking,i decided to send a sms to MP la..and we continued talking thru the phone...and when i reached my place,after cleaning up..we talked again...till 3 in the morning..mainly teases..but then..i was glad me and MP talked..and MP told me a hell lot of things..
but the next day,which is on Valentine's,i had to wake up early for classes..and guess what was installed for us..2 quizes for us: Chemistry and Physics!!!!which i was not prepared for it..darn!!!!!so,chemistry,luckily elangesh was sitting beside me..so apalagi la..terus copy la..but tell u what la..i couldn't even finish copy..coz by the time i'm up to question 2,die la..the lecture said pens down..i hate that pondan la!!!!!!!!gek sei la..he just ruined my valentine's day!...then,after chemistry lec.,have to shift to another lecture hall..this time,the physics lecturer said we have something on today..quiz...darn!..so..my day was indirectly over because of the quizes..and then,things were busy as i was rushing to complete my assignments and lab reports on time..due this thursday..and tutorials to be completed this thursday too..shit la..die la..
*ivan just gave me an enormous valentine's card.my gawd..should see the size of the card la..my eyes also went big d...
hahha....
*MP leaving tomorrow.
Posted by khian at 11:08 PM on February 15, 2006 in .
MP has just DEPARTED sat on a AEROPLANE and left for Australia AT 9.30PM..
i'm in grief now..before i left,i told MP that i'll be waiting....
i hope MP really gets my point...i'm missing MP already...
and now,i;ve to choose a picture of myself to be inserted into a montage for chinese gathering night which is an illegal gathering for all the chinese students in UTP..so this year,my batch will be the one organizing..so must tunjuk-tunjuk muka sikit lor..kekke..free publicity lor..heheh..so had a hard time choosing a nice picture of myself(considering all my pictures are nice,so must choose one EXTRA nice one lor..hehhe)
found!..err,..ppl minta one picture,i gave them 3 pictures..hahha..asked them to put everything in lor..kakka...
Posted by khian at 11:06 AM on February 16, 2006 in .
i'm having classes in the lab now..something to do with English..but being the rebellious self,i've decided to log onto tabulas and update my blog..(it's in English,and this class is something on English mar..so i was just straying off a little..no harm right?)..so now,here i am!..with loads of work to do..and also updating for the sake of my readers..hahha..i still wonder why people still come to my page and actually read my entries..coz i find it boring myself..haha..many have came up to me and actually asked me to stop writing coz i bore their asses off..haha..can't blame them really,coz almost 90% of my entries are about MP and also how depressing i am..hehe..and as i've numbered all my entries..i'm actually up to the 221st entry now..which..is something to be proud of,i supposed..at least,i'm doing something englishy..hehe..
it's gonna be a very busy year for me..as i'm now in Rotaract which needs alot of my time and attention...and i've just attended an interview in EDX which stands for 'i'm not sure'..but it's an exhibition displaying all the FYP'S(final year projects) and coz it's a major event every semester...which if i happened to be in the commitee,i'll have to sacrifice a lot of my time..i dunno..having my fingers crossed that i have 36 hours in a day..coz i certainly depreived in sleeps recently..my gawd!the amount of assignments that are pilled up..and i'm still behind my lectures..i don't understand a single thing during lectures..my goodnes..i really don't want to flunk this sem..not at this crucial moment..oh yeah,i've joined a competition organized by ICC(INTERNATIONAL CULTURAL CLUB) IN utp LA..me,pinky and punchee is going to 'fight' on the 4th of march..haha..hopefully we'll win la..get a food hamper at least..chances are very high,i guess..coz the organizing commitee happens to be our coursemates!..hehe..*if any of u happened to read this leh,u all know what to do la..and no,this is neither a threat nor bribery...
shall be back this saturday morning..rushing back to go to ACS for the annual play..can't wait to laugh enjoy the play..hahha..and probably be having dinner with maylee and the rest..busy busy busy me..!..and then after that..perhaps 3 weeks later before the mid-sem break..haha...tests are just around the corner and seriously i don't want to screw my life this sem..
Since last night,i've been thinking of MP non-stop..and today,when i woke up,MP appeared in the corner of my mind too-nearly slipped in the washroom this morning..considering i didn't sleep well last night..paiseh!!
sigh..miss u,MP!...
Posted by khian at 11:30 AM on February 16, 2006 in .
" when two friends fall in love they learn they are meant for each other. When they fall out of love, they realize they want to keep each other forever.."
---Naushal
stripped of from mel's page(sorry mel for not waiting for your approval..)
Maybe doing relationships is not my type of thing..maybe i just want to have a good time only..i just want the moment to last when it can..and end it when it's too painful..i didn't know how much i was able to love,till i met MP..the pain MP has brought me..the love i felt from MP..i'm sure all my readers know what i was dealing with throughout the past 7 months..
is this what they call true love?..
or just plain stupidity..?
i'm not sure..but i bet u guys are not sure too...
coz in life,we are not sure with what we are dealing with..we just have to wait till the right time comes when the truth is revealed.i don't know about u..but i'm certain with how i feel.
Anyone of u have actually watched 'The L word'?nice show(minus the dirty scenes)..but somehow,like 'THE OC' and 'Desperate Housewives',u learn alot of things from these series..how they deal with people and the drama..kinda reflects on how we deal with things..
"dear mel,i don't know whether u are facing any difficulties or any problems of any sort..i realised that at the same time,as we grew older,problems are inevitable..in the corner of the world,like where fang is now,or eu queen,or michelle lee,eewan,..adeline,MP,..shereen,foo,yeesan..goh,dai..karmun,..or me..we have our own problems..but i always believe..we went through high school together,..i'm sure we can go through problems 'together'..not physically..but mentally,we will always be 'together'...(i've no idea what i'm saying)..u get my point..19 is the age of problems..when there will be more hormonal changes..so bear with my entries for the next 12 months..haha..do take care,mel..u know my number..oh yeah..cheer up kid..and i love you.(in a friendly sort of manner).."
Posted by khian at 01:31 AM on February 17, 2006 in .
"i'm thinking of you..i love you..
i love u too much to let u go.."
-me-
Posted by khian at 11:29 PM on February 17, 2006 in .
i'm sitting comfortably on my bed,updating from my room..after all the extra effort of extending the phone line into my room and connect my laptop to the internet..finally,i've settled down..with the pillow behind my back..and my blanket all over me..with the picture of MP on my right..and my bottle of water on my left..my laptop on my lap(duh!)..with the door shut and locked..and the radio blasting..i'm serving the net with the comfort of my bed..haha..oh yeah,i'm in my own room now,back in ipoh for the weekend..purposely to watch the ACS play tomorrow which is on saturday..the anticipated play of the year..*cough-cough* MIGHT be doing a review after the play..still thinking whether it's worth blogging..haha..(no offence!)
hmm..send MP a lot of emails lately..hope they are received coz i receive nil replies..well..alright,i had one..but it was a lil cold,written without feelings..perhaps replied in a hurry..or just to be polite..i dunno..*thanks punchee and pinky,..for staying up again and listen to my whinnings-often about the same old thing..thank you..
have my whole day planned out tomorrow..going to study my physics erm...glance through..and then..get my hair cut..it's starting to curl up d..and i look horrijible in long hair..makes me look too old for my age..and..gives people the impression that i'm a weakling..so must cut it short..make me look a bit cool..hahha...mum was complaining again...that i don't look like my age and i don't dress like it..haha..perhaps she is in the season of TRYING to get me into a SKIRT..ok..don't ask me why i dread wearing it ok?coz i just dread wearing it..haha..
just found out that there will be a prom night for all the chinese students in UTP..it's an annual thing..and..should i go?i don't feel like going coz certainly it's a formal event..and they would be likely to put me into a gown or something..which i don't want to be in one..sigh..am i abnormal or wat?i just don't like wearing one..is that weird?..except for the ones that can't be avoided..like the school uniforms..especially form 6's..i don't know la..so probably not going..(there goes my chance of scouting leng chais)...hahha...seriously..UTP..no leng chai at all la..
read li's entry..she said she wasn't turning out the way she used to be..erm..people change...for instance,i do..in fact,i've already changed alot..used to be a care-free person..with no worries..and a cheerful one too!i'm always the class-joker,talking about everything under the sun,without thinking about the consequences..just move on everytime i fall down..but NOW,the new angkhian..is nowhere near that...ok..i still joke around,but not as much as i used to..maybe i've grown older..and nope,..no longer a cheerful person..oklar..got laugh la..make jokes la..here and there..but..coz..i'm hiding something..i'm trying to hide the sadness inside..trying to put it deep down,hide in a big chest,lock it and throw the key FAR FAR away..i do smile now..but no longer a sincere one..Smile because i don't want to disappoint people..don't want them to know that i'm upset inside..SMILE coz i feel the need of doing so,not because i want to do so..life is sad isn't it?things change when we grow older..sigh..maybe i don't want to grow up that fast..where did my 18th year go?..i guess i spend it being upset over MP..and somehow,the time has passed before my eyes..sigh..nope,not regret..just that..TIME DOES FLY..
going to be a '1st year' this July..can't believe i'm in a university now..tertiary education..and i'm still nowhere in a skirt..haha..my parents must be really devastated..hehe..what to do?
*li..though we were never really close before..but..thanks for visiting my site regularly..i'll always be updating..though i know the level of boringness..but still,i couldn't thank you enough for being 'here' all the time..
now,..to get back to my series..
Posted by khian at 03:13 AM on February 18, 2006 in .
What am i doing up this late,at 3.11 in the morning and still not in bed?!!!
i waited for your emails..i checked every hour,hoping to see my emails being replied..but nope,there was none..
foolish i may seem to be-but i'm YOUR fool..so perhaps,i can still wait..
i'll be waiting for the replies-hopefully a positive response?..
u are the reason why i'm still living with hope..
Posted by khian at 04:03 AM on February 18, 2006 in .
I hope no one read my entry this early morning coz when i read them again today..i don't even understand what i've written..so..i have edited this entry again..so it's gonna be the 226/227th entry..
Since i've nothing better to do..i went to minishorts.net and read her entries..coz wei ern said it was kinda fun to read..so as it is 3.45 in the morning with nothing else better to do..i've decided to read her entries and yeap!..it was kinda interesting..well,at least better than mine..i do enjoy reading her entries..so i supposed i'll be constantly reading hers from now..
i wanted to write about something earlier on..but i forgot what i wanted to write about..oh man..this is a bad sign-i'm aging..which is not good at all..
hmm..i wanted to write about something..and my batteries are dying on me soon..and my eyes..they want to close already..die la..faster faster..what did i planned to write in the 1st place?..
oh yeah...
MOOD SWINGS...(terrible ones)
i've a friend..shall not be named..who constantly having the time of the month,sometimes if we are lucky,we have it once a month...if we are not,it can go till twice a month,thrice per month..or maybe 4,5,6, times..god knows how many times..well..he..well,my friend's a guy in this case..he has this situation when he would get very angry inside..but then..no one knows the reason why he feels angry..all of a sudden,his mood will change 180 degrees..and then be a totally different person..he asked me how can he change himself..so that people will not be afraid of him during that time of the month..i told him that GIRLS are eligible to act upon their mood,but for guys,it's a lil 'uncool' considering the fact that they are supposed to be the stronger sex..SUPPOSED la....hehhe...do leave comments people..i don't know how to help him la weh...
anyway,as i was saying about moodswings..i too,can't run away from the fact that i've them too..especially that time of the month..when some 'relatives' decide to stop by again..and irritate me all over again..during that time of the month,those who have known me since young would have known the moodswings i have..i can be laughing at one certain moment and then,the next,i'll be a sulking and moody angkhian..even now,when i'm going to turn 19 soon,i can't deny the fact that i've mood swings too at times..but what can we really do about this?
is it just because of one person who has moodswings,everyone else's mood is entitled to be affected too?Why do we have to become selfish people..?dragging down the atmosphere with our unhappiness..why can't we hide our moodswings and pretend to be happy instead?When i was in UTP during the earlier days,..someone told me that my moodswings are unbearable and it kinda made her frustrated..and since then,i've tried hiding them..telling them that i was fine..but in actual fact,i can be very mood-less inside at times..wouldn't that be a tad hard sometimes?trying to please the people around u instead of being your trueself?shouldn't we live our life,instead of acting just to please the people around us?Anyhow,i did try to hide it-ler..smile fakish-ly every time whenever i feel my mood's going down..what can i do but that?i don't want the entire community to feel that i'm one depressing soul,eh?
gawd..i'm feeling rather sleepy..sorry if this entry is half way tanggling..my grammartical error was a lot,i guess..so..i really..really would like to apologise if u have no idea what i'm writing about..
(to be continued)-when i've enough sleep and time to write again..
resume this morning(18/2)..as i was talking about the moodswings,last night,when i have already finished watching the series..suddenly,at 3.54 in the morning,tzeyang messaged me..telling me that he's already finished watching 'The Constant Gardener'..(we bought the dvd together-i brought him there to buy la)i was so surprised coz there's actually someone who's still awake in the wee hours of the morning...and u know what,he told me that punchee..a.k.a my roommate also couldn't sleep..haha..punchee,punchee..i know u are missing my absence..but i'll be back on Sunday..haha..but alrightla,i know the real reason of your insomnia..i guess,we,as roommates can't really run away from that kind of problem right?somehow,we were fated as room mates,u are there to complete me..and VICE VERSA..hahah...i shall not disclose OUR problems here..alright?only we will know..hahahha....
week 5 next week in Uni..approaching test week..gosh...
now-i shall be getting ready..taking the cab out to get my haircut..haha..gonna make it S-H-O-R-T...I look so fucking-ly old in long hair..sigh..should start wearing the lens after this..look much cuter..(i guess!)-THIS IS my blog la..should give some credit to my ownself alright?no laughing behind your computer screens..k??
Good day to me......ok-oklar..to u also la...
Posted by khian at 01:04 PM on February 18, 2006 in .
Goh complained that my blog is boring-membosankan dan sepatutnya to be closed down by now...should i listen to her?
ok..wait..she didn't ask me to close it down la..she just asked me to blog about something happier..but then,it wouldn't be MY-angkhian's blog la right?maybe people come to my blog to read depressing entries and they enjoy it leh?..MAYBE...
call me an idiot,but i'm just an idiot with lotsa love for u...
have been listening to Fort Minor's cd since last night..not bad la weh..not bad at all...!!..should try it..haha..dont download la ok?go buy pirated..wakakakak....
(there,i've added colours to my entries..so,now ...are u feeling happy,goh?)
Posted by khian at 04:53 PM on February 18, 2006 in .
i've finally returned home with a hair cut..and guess how much i was charged?!!
rm55
blardy hell..blardy expensive..for wat??!!
just a trim only ok..?also not much difference also la..
shall upload my pic tonight..
gek sei yan!!..
Posted by khian at 12:44 AM on February 19, 2006 in .
just returned home from the play-ACS play to be exact..and well,..i shall not do a review on the play..should let goh do that instead..all i want to say that the play was worth watching..really..this year,i guess with the help of Xavier Fong U-shin(ex.student director) who has certainly contributed alot in helping out here and there..coz obviously the student directors-Ooi Kar Mun& Dahineswari aren't experienced enough to direct such a production YET..hahah...and i must give credit to Marianne Poh who was the lead actress,i think..she was Katharine Minola in the 'Taming of the Shrew'..and she IS the shrew..she acted with full of gusto..and she was full of expression..wahliao..and u know what..her actions are exactly like Lydia's..haha..
in a nutshell,this year's production was definitely better than the previous years'..just that the actors were eating up their words and we find it hard to hear what they were trying to say..and i do realised that the actress all spoke chinesy-english..which doesn't suit the play at all..must take note la..
and i'm so pooped right now..i haven't taken my dinner and it's already 12.44 am..now deciding whether to go eat or not..maybe i should not..i dunno..on diet la weh..
Posted by khian at 01:36 PM on February 19, 2006 in .
this morning i woke up..the moment i opened my door,i saw longans on the dining table..
the reason why i'm obsessed with longans..
i just started my day with longans..and i can't stop thinking of that certain person..
*if u are reading this,i'm sure u still remember that...
muacks!!
Posted by khian at 08:59 PM on February 19, 2006 in .
Please Khian....
u are starting to scare me..i'm getting a lil annoying and stressful with ur constant emails..i just want to be friends..u kept repeating the same thing in your emails..i'm seriously annoyed..u are welcome if u stop bringing in the same topic..like what ade've said..it's gone case..
Fuck you!tell me which part of me is wrong..?to continue loving a person after so long...or my existance here in this part of the world??
i'm so fuckingly stupid to believe that we still stand a chance..
i'm just so fuckingly mad at myself right now...
i'm fucking sorry if this entry contains vulagarity..i'm so disappointed with this person..as well as at myself..
fuckingly stupid..but fuckingly loyal..
FUCK!....
Posted by khian at 10:37 PM on February 20, 2006 in .
no more dreadful entries from now onwards..at least,there will be no more news of MP from now onwards..to those who are reading this entry and find me writing something about me being sad again about si MP..kindly leave dreadful harsh words on my comment box or the tagboard..ok?
i've finally decided to let everything behind me now..i've no time to deal with all these petty stuffs anymore coz now,i've realised that my time can be used for better things such as getting my assignments done and scoring 4.0 this sem..albeit updating this blogpage of mine..
i attended the Rotaract Board of Directors meeting last night..and i was appointed as the Funding Director for the term 06/07 and from now onwards,i shall be busy cracking my head to think of ways to raise funds for the club and also the society..important position la wey..i've received my task for this month and one of it includes getting my proposal ready..and also ways of raising funds for the club.Have to attend frequent meetings now..no more giving stupid excuses such as loads of assignments and anything else..speaking of that..i've to attend this saturday's meeting because the President elect is rushing back from Malacca to see his new board of directors..Ironically,my assistant Director is 3( THREE) yEARS older than i am and he is now in Internship Training..wahliao..everyone was as surprised as i am..i hope i'll be able to carry out the duties well..and..u know..anyone who's reading this and is from UTP..kindly spare some time to join Rotaract and please join my avenue..:--FUNDING..k? which now comes to me having to attend the DRA- District Rotary Assembly in Morib on the 21st April which costs me rm235..there goes my allowance!...and guess what..i'm also involved in EDX..this term..which also will be taking up half of my time,attending meetings,tending to my roommate-a.k.a my avenue head..so..no ponteng-ing of that meeting also..and guess what..EDX is on the 25th,26th and 27th of April..i guess.April is gonna be a VERY BUSY month for me..not to forget,finals is just a month away from April..Darn!!..but..looking at the bright side.i get to keep my mind away from thinking of that blardy MP..which is causing me mental disorder now..
i have 2 test this week itself..and i guess..it's time for me to move on with my own life..(i hope this resolution works this time!)
people,pray for me please?..
Posted by khian at 12:01 AM on February 21, 2006 in .
i've finally finished with my latest assignment..phew..
The Effects on Globalization in a Developing Country like Malaysia
Everyday we hear it on the news, we read it in the papers, we overheard people talking about it and in every single instance the word globalization seems to have a different meaning. So, what is globalization?
At a top political and economic level, globalization is the process of denationalization of markets, politics and legal systems, for instance, the rise of the so-called global economy. The consequences of this political and economic restructuring on local economies, human welfare and environment are the subject of an open debate among international organizations, governmental institutions and the academic world. Different culture and economic systems around the world are becoming connected to each other because of the large multinational companies and of improved communication. It is an overarching international system shaping the domestic politics and foreign relations of virtually every country. So, what does globalization brings to our country? Is it good or bad?
Globalization is much like fire; it is neither good nor bad. If used properly, fire can cook food, keep us warm, sterilize iron and form iron. If used carelessly, fire can destroy lives.
Globalization brings in the positive reasons in economically wise because businesses will improve due to the larger market. There will be stable economic growth which means more job opportunities, lowering the unemployment rate in the country. When there is globalization, there would be no barriers to trade like quota, subsidy, tariff which encourages exports and imports. Globalization brings development to the country, for example, there will be a lot of job opportunities and there will be increase in demand for people. When everyone has work which results the standard of living to increase. Thus, the country prosper.
However, socially, globalization connects people, but there will be a possibility of eroding cultures and traditions. When entering the modern / globalization era, people will be too focused on the improvement of one’s lives, not into cultures. Everyone is into the rat race, that no one longer concentrate on the traditions that was passed down from previous generations. Let’s face it : How many people nowadays uses their mother tongue? Everyone practically uses the connecting language which is the English language. People are moving out from the rural areas to embrace a newer and perhaps, a better lifestyle. To them, traditions are not cool, unnecessary and a waste of time which explains why it is dying.
Globalization also causes destruction towards the country. This is probably because Malaysians are still not matured enough to handle the drastic changes that globalization has brought in. Malaysia might have the first-class facilities and services but they certainly have third-world mentality citizens. Therefore, many might not be able to cope with the drastic changes that might occur to the country if globalization were to be introduced.
Globalization brings in the technology from other advanced countries. For instance, in the medical field, common diseases can now be cured with the advanced technology brought in by developed countries. In the past, when people used to die from incurable diseases but now, things are different now. Dead organs can now be replaced with the aid of the stem cell technology.
In a nutshell, globalization does bring in the pros and cons, so it is entirely up to us to decide whether it is a good or bad thing. Globalization is however, important to a developing country such as Malaysia, and we should not neglect the negative sides of it. I guess the only thing that we are able to do is to fix the problem, instead of avoiding it by choosing not to accept the idea of globalization. Globalization should not be blamed instead.
done..with a slight tone of boringness..
Posted by khian at 05:33 PM on February 21, 2006 in .
the only reason why i'm still alive at this point,i must certainly thank my roommate and my friends..
erm..assignments are pilling up..and guess what..Elangesh-my coursemate la..very buddy buddy one..(kinda lengchai la..)..he's my saviour..i'll always remember that he was always the one there for me 1 hour before my tests..he would be the patient one,who's there for me,teaching me the essence of the subjects and then,soon after that,one hour later,we take the test..wahliao..imagine that..he's always there during the crucial moments..HOWEVER,one thing girls,he's taken..darn!..anyway,he came up to me this morning,asked me whether i'm interested in helping him out during the Communication what what week in UTP la..because Elangesh is one of the MPPUTP..erm..the student representatives la..so,he asked me whether i'll be free to help him out or not..so..being my usual nice self..plus this is gonna look good in my resume later..so,i agreed..and then,when i asked him again when will the communication week..and he told me..it's gonna be on the 18th-21st April...
*shit*
please refer to my previous entry why i dread the month of April..
now,i can say bye-bye to my finals this sem..
EDX, Rotaract and now..MPPUTP...
oh wait..i've a big game this saturday and sunday...
damn....
Posted by khian at 07:13 PM on February 21, 2006 in .
Sometimes,i love being an island..there's this saying..'NO man can be an island'..well..AT TIMES,being an island..can be really really nice..I love listening to my breathings at times,when there's no one around..when there's no talking involved and i can actually hear my own thoughts..
BECAUSE..when i tried opening myself up..i really can't stand some people's attitude..some people can be VERY,REALLY ignorant towards your feelings.Just because they feel that it's alright for them to voice out what's inside,they just do it..have they ever think of the consequences before acting or in this case,saying out their thoughts aloud?
there were a few times,when i've kept quiet,thinking that i'm the only one being hypersensitive,but then,why is it hurting so much inside out?i tried covering my feelings and emotions but there's a limit in one's feelings.I wonder how long it'll take before i burst into tears or maybe into pieces..(*and i don't cry alright?so when i say i'll burst into tears means it's devastating already..)..we are already reached the age of maturity so,we hold responsibility in our actions plus words.But some people,they just say whatever they want..they don't care whether their words affect the people they are talking about..all they want to do is just let out the words they have in their heart..and mind u,i didn't say from their mind coz people like them,don't use their mind..maybe it's on their butt or something..i dunno..
i know i'm not exactly the brilliant student they have here and compared to my friends,i'm just an idiot..i don't care if the rest see me as some sort of dummy who is not even qualified to attend classes in UTP..but i'm already trying my best to redeem myself,to be up the same par with the rest,but hello,i can't do it if i've other things in my mind right now?right?i don't really care how the rest see me..i know sometimes,i don't mingle with the people here..in fact,i'm an anti-social here in UTP,at times i don't talk to the rest of the people here but that doesn't mean u know who i am. Who are u to judge me if u are not so sure who i am...?
i hate the life i'm leading now.people here are assholes ignorant unfriendly..i just want to crawl back to my own shell and never to come out again.i don't care how the people see now,coz i simply do not give a damn.i want to go back to the place where i feel important:- back home.
*u know who u are,thanks for being there whenever i'm upset.Please don't tell anyone how i feel about UTP k?i just don't like it here already.
-i'm sorry i'm no longer the happy-go-lucky angkhian u people once have.i just don't like faking my smiles anymore.i don't have to.so whenever i'm upset,please don't approach me.u don't want me to throw my tantrum.
Posted by khian at 09:12 PM on February 21, 2006 in .
There is something inside
That I must now confess
It is the love I feel for you
That has left my heart a mess.
I've loved you for a lifetime
Yet never did I truly say
How much you really meant to me
So now I will begin, if I may?
You're my reason to wake up
And the reason to fall asleep
You are the angel in my dreams
And buried in my heart so deep.
Without your smile I would die
Everything inside me would decay
I'd have no reason left to live
So please promise forever you'll stay.
I do not believe in trusting
But somehow I have faith in you
I've never given myself to anyone
But here I am, giving myself to you.
In your gaze I rest alone
I cannot stand to look away
And it scars me you do not know
How easily you brighten my day.
You are the perfect paradigm
Of a knight in shining armor
Always secretly watching over me
Fighting off anyone who'd harm me.
It hurts me to see you walk away
But it stings to know the facts
Deep inside you love me too
But you're scared of how I will react.
Now were here balancing the scale
Feeling love for one another
But stuck on opposite ends
Afraid to honestly tell eachother.
Until we break these chains
We will never rise above
So please do not bruise me anymore
Just tell me you're in love.
-taken from eewan's blogpage.nice.
Posted by khian at 01:46 PM on February 23, 2006 in .
i nearly fainted while taking a shower last night..
~no..it has nothing to do with the bowl of soup i drank,cooked by Tze Yang..NO,SERIOUSLY..it really had nothing to do with him..
hehe..so,big deal,tze yang cooked soup last night..WHOA..a big deal really..it was his first time,boiling soup..ABC SOUP to be exact ( the one with carrots,onions and potato)..and it was well,..his first time..so..of course we couldn't expect much la..but we reckoned that he should add at least A PINCH OF SALT to give the soup some taste..but anyway,thank you..TZEYANG..and stop calling me 'birdie' for goodness sake..just because i have this great fear of birds..don't have to keep reminding me alright?u don't want me to post your latest name in this blog huh?...and i thought HELLO KITTY was terrible enough..one more 'birdie' from you..u are so gonna get it from me k?!
Anyway,i had this sms conversation with tzeyang just recently.here how it goes.:-
TY: chirp chirp!..why are u so afraid of birds,birdie..?
me: i just don't like the feathers they have on them..Horrible creatures..
TY: that explains why u don't like guys..just joking..
me: oo..that type of birds i like..i just don't like the birds with feathers..but if it's hair,i like wor..
TY: HAH?what if your husband's one has no hair next time?
me: aiya,just buy hair tonic for him lor..
-i shall leave u people to figure out what we were talking about..
Posted by khian at 09:30 PM on February 23, 2006 in .
Freaking pissed with how people were brought up since young..
with no freaking respect for others..
right now,i'm just eating up your words,but wait till the day i burst out..
(i'm no saint,but i'm ain't a pain)
~i know i'm not perfect,doesn't give u the right to be a pain in the ass..my ass in this case....
Posted by khian at 09:58 PM on February 23, 2006 in .
SMK BANDAR SUNWAY..
Your ex head girl is my CURRENT roommate..and she told me she was the head girl of the school...
guess how i responded?????
KAKAKAKKAKAKAKAKKAKA....HEHEHHEHEHEHE...
I DOUBT SHE WAS THE HEAD GIRL..KNOW WHY?
SHE IS CONSTANTLY BEING BULLIED BY MUA!!!!!.....
HAHAHAHHAA...(EVIL GRIN...)
Posted by khian at 01:18 PM on February 24, 2006 in .
just went through physics quiz at 10 this morning..and i just went through another test..to see what colour i am..
Your color is black. The color of night. Serene and mysterious, black conjures up images of elegant evening gowns, dashing tuxedos, and gleaming limousines. Traditionally a symbol of success, black also represents power and an uncompromising demand for perfection. Not surprisingly, you tend to set challenging goals for yourself and do whatever it takes to achieve them — your strength of character is second to none. This unfaltering determination, along with your natural elegance, impresses people. But keep in mind that your personality might be intimidating to some. Try to temper your demanding side with a little softness — trust us, it won't kill you. Overall, though, black is the color of professionalism and achievement, which means it's clearly the color for you.
(so true...)
Posted by khian at 01:23 PM on February 24, 2006 in .
Month of February..a few birthdays..celebrated 2 birthdays this week itself..
Pictures that were taken:-
from left to right: ME,shea teng,punchee,SAM,sharon & pinky
from left to right: ME,jiamin,punchee & pinky
from left to right : pinky,sharon,ME & punchee
from left to right : ME and my 'lou po chai'..i was holding our wedding cake...hehhe
from left to right: sheateng,punchee,ME,sam,sharon,pinky,jiamin& aiting
First time stepping into UTP..(1ST SEM)..my first group of friends..
8 months after our first semester..we turned into:-
no..we didn't turn bigger in size..ok..?
Posted by khian at 02:13 PM on February 24, 2006 in .
read puiyeen's blog today..she mentioned something about most of us might not be spending the rest of our lives with someone who we really love..
how true i must say..i do certainly agree with puiyeen..sometimes,in life,we'll somehow meet the person that we love very much..HOWEVER,There's no guarantee that u might be spending your entire life with that particular person.
I remember once someone told me that u might be in love with this certain person,but the person that u'll be marrying most probably will not be that person.. .haha..guess what..she's right..couldn't agree more..
WHY must that happen leh?
can't it be like BOY meets GIRL, BOY falls in love with GIRL, BOY and the GIRL happily ever after?
so simple theory..yet complicated to be understood..
Posted by khian at 03:48 AM on February 26, 2006 in .
I DON'T HAVE TIME TO ANSWER THE SAME OLD QUESTION OVER AND OVER AGAIN...
*note to self :- GUYS are annoying..stay away..
i need to stay away from the computer..from today onwards..i have tests in 2 weeks time..and i..just need some time on my own..do some catching up..i need tranquility..and whatsoever in the package..
and blardy..i need some sleep badly..attended a 4 hour formal meeting with the Rotaractors and also District Rotractors all the way from KL this morning..and it's a Saturday..sat down..listened to what they had to say..and also..kept fooling around with the 3 seniors..only 4 chinese are in this commitee..sigh..
Slept at 6.30 this morning..and had to wake up at 9 to attend the bloody meeting..Pepsi didn't help to keep me awake..thank goodness,San Nien helped a little..hahah..attended the meeting with an empty stomach..right till 4 something..only my lunch came..
There it goes again..
the same old question....
please shut up...please leave me alone..
