Car's back.

My Little Kancil.(yes,the exact one which crashed one year ago)

Some of you may be thinking that what am I doing with that crushed Kancil again?Don't I ever learn that small cars no good?..

Do i even have a choice? Daddy doesn't want to get me a new bigger car.What to do la right?

The car looks brand new from the outside.Looks like shit from the inside.
The dashboard has big scratches.The compartment near the gearbox is no longer there.The stereo doesn't play well anymore.One minute the music will be blasting, and the next, it plays softly..OR it doesn't play at all. The aircond...oh wait..WHAT AIRCOND?? The aircond has no air.(contradiction)..

I have to admit that I was pretty scared when I first took hold of the wheel.Not because I lacked of experience, but being so accustomed with bigger and wider space cars, i was afraid that driving a kancil is gonna be difficult. Dad's pajero and Mum's Kia has power sterengs..Dad's Pajero has good pick up speed.Dad's and Mum's stereo plays perfectly.Dad's and Mum's aircond has AIR.

My Kancil has none of above.
Dang!!~

Anyway, I went out at night to try the new car out.Fresh from the mechanics. It was 8.45 pm when my bro saw the car parked outside.He was surprised but then, he wanted to have a ride.So, mum wasn't keen of the idea of me driving at night, so she tagged along.I brought them around town, driving with only 60km/h and mum was already shouting at the back of the car.Deng!!..In the end, Stopped by at Oldtown Kopitiam's..and saw my aunties..Sigh.I paling tak suka these aunties..The first thing they said when they saw mum was, "Haiyoo,why u let your daughter drive at night.??So dangerous..Yeslor, don't let her take the car back to UTP..don't let her drive there..So unsafe..Last time, when [insert my cousin's name] studied there, I also didn't let her drive.."

OMFG. Like her daughter is my business la?..and my mum..sigh..INFLUENCED HABIS!..so,now,i can't take my car to UTP.wth weh!
and i really hate the fact that my mum really listens to what my aunties say.
For example,a few cousins of mine, graduated with First Class Honours, so my mum thinks it's easy as peanuts to get a degree with First Class.So, everytime i bising about my work,she'll repeat the same old thing over and over again.
Say la..that this cousin can get First Class..that cousin..WTF!
So, if she say until so easy, then perhaps, my mum should go take an Engineering Degree hor?

Back to my car, I managed to bring my mum and bro back in 2 pieces.
Dad refused to follow.(hmm..~) he has no confidence in small cars,let alone,a kancil.He was already pissed when mum secretly bought a kancil home one day..He wanted to get me a WIRA..WIRA LA..!!bigger car...and mum had to ruin his plans..
DANG~~!

So i guess I am stuck with that Little Kancil till..erm..bro gets his license..
or maybe till i've finally able to convince my dad to get me a bigger and a newer car..

My blogging rate has decreased.
Know why?
Probably my bigger passion in life has came back.
Yeap,the car.
So, Whenever the time allows, I'll just grab my personal car and go anywhere I want.
No more having to answer calls while driving,and realise that mum wants her car back.
No more looking forward to weekends to fork out excuses to drive Dad's car..

I drove all the way to Ipoh Garden and back with Bro today.
With no destination in mind,but just pure driving..
Mum asked me whether my car runs on H20 or what..
Hahha..
I can always,..always take some back from UTP..afterall that uni is under PETRONAS...
Petrol comes like water in there..
[Duh!~no lar,..now u can close the open-mouth of yours~]

One bad thing about that car is the aircond has finally break down.
Something wrong with the compressor-I reckon.
Have to send in back to the mechanics tomorrow and Meiling told me that I'd at least need 3 hours to get it fix.
Luckily she's willing to accompany me wait until it's fixed!..Hmm..
........

Finally meeting up with Waizin tomorrow Night.
and meeting up with Eewan tomorrow too!~
Heng Dai's night together! (my drinking partner!)

Meiling kept telling me that things won't happen twice..won't happen twice..in fact, when i drove to the mechanics in First Garden from town, these words kept running in my head..
I thought Perhaps, things won't happen twice.
And so I thought...

I'm still recovering from the shock actually.
Am not supposed to blog about what happened because I promised.
but thank Goodness for Kangaroo Bars!!

Went to MGS and ACS today.
Learnt something today.
Waiting is not what I like doing (but who does,anyway?)
Assam House in Greentown.
Food not nice.
Next round would be this Saturday but Meiling won't be around.

*Thanks for accompanying me to the MECHANICS..I know it's dreadful for you to sit in a NON-Aircond car..Hahha..

Met up with Waizin, Lydia, Eu Queen, Kwong Hoe, Ying Tuan and Ban in pizza hut to celebrate Waizin's 19th birthday..
Baskin Robbin's Ice cream was on me next.
Meeting up with Eewan tomorrow and then to collect my car in the afternoon.
Finally,..Hopefully, the aircond works.

Went out with Eewan and Euqueen the whole day today.
*Thanks yar!!
They went out to accompany me while waiting for my car to be ready..
Hehhe..
This was the 2nd time I went back to the mechanics..
Or so I thought..
I have to go back tomorrow morning again because something is wrong with my gear box..
Can't u believe this?..
Whenever I drive a car..even if it is a manual car, my engine doesn't and NEVER goes dead..!
NEVER--not even when i was learning..
and today, it was my fault that the traffic in Ipoh Garden got congested..
*I was so embarassed*
and everyone started to honk me at the back.
Even Eewan who was driving her Merc,drove past me..
Dang..Luckily I was only half panicked..
I put on my hazard lights, and tried restarting my cars again.
It stalled a little and died again.
I turned the keys again..Worried because I don't know what to do..
The engine started,..i put the gear to 'D'..and i stepped on the accelerator..
It DIED for the second time..
I tried,..was on the verge of crying..
this time, it worked.
I sped to the front, didn't even look behind..
in time before the light turned red.
I thought that was the last time..
It happened for a few thousand of times later.
Which is why i HAVE TO send my blardy car back to the mechanics tomorrow..
I hope my car doesn't die tomorrow..

" You are a good person, Khian " - Foo

  "You're a great person ang khian" -- Yiling

It was worth staying up late tonight.It's 3 in the morning now and I have to wake up in 3 hours- time..
Was talking to foo online, didn't want to end the conversation halfway..so i was stuck there..hehe..We talked.. and talked..
and the line..?..she said it to me before the conversation ended..

Yiling was also online late..doing some sort of web page thing..and she made my day by saying the line i stated above..

You know what they say about words being able to cure..?
Yes, those words just made my day..

I love you both, for acknowledging my presence in your life..

I hate mechanics.
Damn.
I was supposed to take my granddad out for breakfast today, I promised him that I'll bring him out if my car is back.
I woke up at 7 this morning, tried starting my car, but it refused to start itself.
I started it again, finally the engine roared and yes, I moved..
The petrol indicator was towards E..so i thought perhaps I should pump in some petrol before driving to my granddad's.
As I was crossing the main road, which happens to be busy and all, my engine decided that it's time for it to go dead..and so it did.
I was stuck there,frantically starting my engine again..and again..
I went to pump the petrol in, and called my granddad.
I doubt I can even bring him out, and it was not worth risking his life in my car.
I drove from my place, up to first garden.
I have to admit that I was afraid that the car might stop halfway and if I'm unlucky, some car might bang me from the back.
Still, i have to go there, coz the mechanics are there.
I reached there at 8.30 and the uncle who was incharged of my car, told me that it would only take them 2-3 hours to get the car fix.
I didn't want to trouble my dad so I told him I shall wait there, till the car is fixed.
I went to a coffee shop nearby, had my breakfast, sat there for 2 hours,while reading my cleo.
Went back,sat in their office for another hour,till the man came in.
He said something is wrong with the engine, might take them a little longer to fix it.
I was already pissed because he could have told me earlier, instead of letting me waiting after so long..
I kept quiet, dialled my dad's number and went home.
Before that, he told me that the car can be collected at 3 later this afternoon.
He was so sure..so confident..
My mum fetched me there again,I reached at 4.
I thought they would need an extra hour..just in case..
I went there, I saw my car's bonet still opened.
The timing belt was still lying on the floor.
The uncle ( mechanic) was tending to other cars.
I was getting angrier.
The mechanic approached me,saying that the car is not ready yet.
They need to change one part and it'll cost a bomb.
He asked me to call my dad, and ask him.
He should have called me earlier, ask me whether he should change or not AND not wait till I arrived there, only he tells me.
Moreover, if that part is spoilt,he has to CHANGE it..or else, the car wouldn't move,right?
I couldn't reach my dad, because he was having a meeting..
I asked him,when will I be getting my car back then..
He looked at me, and shrugged..
I couldn't take it anymore.
I went to the car, asked my mum to come down and talk to him.I didn't even feel like looking at him.
I went to my car, took my things out from the car and found my radio turned on.
No one was near my car at that moment, why would the radio be on?
My car batteries would be drained if the radio keeps playing..
I switched off my radio and walked back to mum's car.I didn't even bother to say anything to the man.
It was not the first time this has happened.I've been going back since the car has been released from there.and it's not exactly near my place..
I don't understand why my dad's company cars are sent there..annually and the fee is not cheap.
I don't even understand why the man is assigned to fix my car, can't the manager assign someone who's more responsible?

I took my phone and send my dad, a text message:

He's an asshole. He dumps my car there, didn't do anything to fix it. He needs to change something to that engine, but it's rather expensive.He didn't even make an effort to call and ask us. He just let us drove all the way there, then only he tell us. When I asked when will the car be done, he can't even answer.I didn't even bother looking at him after that. Mum dealt with him then.And I found that my radio was on even though no one was nearby.That will drain my batteries out. At this point, I don't even want the car back. He took 14 months to fix my car and I kept having to go back. The way he talked to me just now, like he doesn't even bother. Bastard!! You call him when you are free. Tell him if he's not interested in fixing my car, tell him to take a hike coz I don't need him to live. I am awfully pissed with his actions. He took such a long time,and I expect a better job.He should at least make sure that everything is fine before releasing the car.Have a nice day =)

I am very angry and I don't get that angry usually.
Aaaarrgghghhh..

Refer to my previous entry about me reading Cleo.
I was reading the horoscopes..and mine stated..

singles in love
If you're getting nowhere, turn on the feminine charm - it may feel odd to start with but you'll quickly enjoy being sultry, especially when the results come in.

haha..if the horoscopes say so..

People who does things with veeto power sucks..
and MUM is one of those people..
She didn't allow me to switch the channels even though she's not in front of the television.
Reason?
Because whenever she feels like watching it, she can just come out and watch; don't have to wait for the page to load.
WTF
and me..what do I do?..Sit there and wait till she's done?
Women.

~~Kill or to be killed~~

Nice motto of life?
Hehhe..Don't worry, not mine though.

I have been driving non stop today.
Wheeee!~~
Just my right type of thing to do.

I told Punchee I was inspired with Grey's Anatomy,
So engrossed that I would like to dismiss myself from UTP, and enrol myself in IMU instead.
I wonder if she bought that.
Hehhe..
She asked me what do i plan to study in IMU..
Medicine perhaps?
[oh man, if she ever finds out about my biology scores back in High School]

So, tomorrow's a Saturday.
No plans, sadly..
Been looking for someone to yumcha tomorrow morning..but F-A-I-L-E-D..
Sigh, holidays are ending soon..
Have to go to Sam Tet tomorrow; bro's report card's day..
Have been threatening him to treat me EXTRA better or else, I'll have a long conversation with his class teacher..Hehhe..

You are an attractive person - Shereen

Muahahaha..

Was driving in and out the whole day.
Went to Sam Tet this morning, fought my car into the parking lot, fought my way out of it.
and i reckoned someone banged into my car when I was away.
The kangaroo bar which has a plastic end, one of the pieces broke.
Hmmph~!

After collecting bro's report card, he told me he has some prefects' duty to do.
Left me,hungry..i didn't take my breakfast, u see..
Kept calling the whole world.Who was interested in having breakfast...
Sadly, people nowadays, don't really wake up early.
Hullo, that was like..err..11 something in the morning..Still refused to wake up.
Ok, last resort, called my cousin brother.
He was still sleeping, woke him up, asked him to get ready by 12.30 pm.
I went home, watched one episode of the TVB drama..Went to his place at 12.45p.m
OMG,he came down the stairs, asking me what was I doing in his home.
Clearly, he just woke up.
I waited for 15 minutes for him to get ready, obviously it was not sufficient.
He usually needs 45 minutes to get ready.
So, i went to Judy's place which was nearby.
It was a long time since we last met.
We had a long, nice chat..
Aww..she's a very nice friend..
Picked my cousin bro for lunch after that..

Supposed to meet up with Eewan and Wei ern for tea..but Wei ern fly plane last minute..
So, plans were cancelled.

Went to Puiyeen's house just now.
Parents' 25th Aniverssary..
Met up with Michelle Lee!!..after a year!..
We hugged.
There were a couple of other people,not to be mentioned though.
I drank half a can of Carlsberg.
Karmun had ONE sip and she went a little dizzy.

Right now, I am killing time..
Planned to watch the match Germany vs Portugal later.
Who should I side?
I'll be leaving in 4 hours time.

I believe everyone has been a bad person at one point in their lives.

A bad child.
A bad grandchild.
A bad friend.
A bad parent.
A bad person.
A bad [insert something here]

Tell me who doesn't agree.hmm?

I forgive and forget easily. That is perhaps one NICE thing about me. One minute I can be very angry with this particular person, and the next, huh, what?
No, I am not a forgetful person.
I just happened to choose to be this way.
Wouldn't life be easier that way?

It really turns me off when someone actually remembers things about the past.
If it's something nice, then it's alright.
But if someone did something to this person, this person can't stop talking about it over and over again.
Why would someone kept thinking about the mistakes, rather than concentrating about the present?
People gets scarrier when they actually have vengence inside them.
Those who wants to take revenge, woe..those kind, are worst.
Horrible.

I come from a world where rainbows DON'T exist and birds are..ewwww...-my current nick.

How can rainbows exist when all people think of is money, and fame? The world is just black and white, no other colours..
Birds?..Err..i'm a avianphobic..but birds are horrible creatures too..

i wonder why they exist.

Oh man..

Wei ern just told me something..
Err..don't know whether i should be angry or what la..

She told me that her friends say that i look bitchy..
oh man..i have a bitchy look?

Glad to know that among us, some of us are really brave enough to take in the truth and MOVE ON..if moving on means life goes on..

*Dai,I don't know if I sounded harsh in my comments, but then, I am just happy for you.

It's nice to know that someone can actually do something which I can't do in such a short period of time.Oklar, I am a lil Proud of you, Just a lil..(cis, enough, don't mengada-ngada!)

Alright, I can't be a loser myself too right?
I met up with my aunties today, and the usual questions which I've seen it coming beforehand. One of them was " So, you and MP..still together?How's MP doing? "

In the past, before I have digest in the cruel fact, I have always answered the usual..to my grandparents,parents and to my other side of the family..
" Oh, MP's doing fine in Australia.MP's gonna be back end of this year and will be coming back for dinners.Don't worry.We are fine and still going on."

I am good in keeping my family and I happy, am I not?

However, things changed today.Or maybe if you people out there have not noticed, my previous entries have not mentioned a single word about MP,..or how heartbroken I still am..or etc..the usual crap. Today, when the other side of my family a.k.a mum's sisters asked me about MP, all i said was,
" Oh, MP? MP who? " or " MP's doing fine. I am fine too. Without one another."

I guess the cold, cruel fact has sunk in and I am happy that it's finally over.

So does that mean I have a little human ego?

Hmm..i kept thinking what Wei Ern has said to me last night.
About her friends saying that I have this bitchy look..
Then I was thinking, do I even know who her friends are..?

It's not easy to earn that title after 19 years of living.
How come AMC girls can see my bitchiness and the MGSian can't eh?
Yahooo!!!
* oh wait, is looking bitchy something good or something bad? *

Couldn't meet up with Wei Ern and Eewan for breakfast on Sunday Morning.
Went for a ONE DAY trip to genting and KL..
I know my blog lacks of pictures these days..So i shall let my pictures do the talking coz i really don't know what to write about.
Genting is still there, Lim Goh Tong's doing a fine job.
I went into a casino, won a few hundred ringgit and yes, the money is spent with my cousin for lunch.
Don't ask me how I entered the casino, the only thing i can say is the guards are just placed there for the sake of display..
My cousin who was 21 this year was stopped for identity check, but mua..I just walked past them.

The display thing in front of the casino.
I didn't know how to win the slot machines. I see the aunties kept winning but I couldn't understand how they won.
When i asked, all they say was " Don't know wor, I just simply press only wor "
Cheh, when I followed their instructions, I kept losing..
In the end, I beh tahan see the cash disappear, so me and my cousin went to the gambling section.
We played 'BIG-SMALL' and both of us won a mere few hundred with only RM 5 modal.
Don't ask me where the money is now.
We spent every single cent in genting for lunch.

My mum and I posing in front of the camera. We were seated at the end of the bus..

Thank goodness my cousins were there with us.Or else I would never have my picture taken.

*Punchee, remember the black shirt I was wearing?? I bought in RomP in 1U leh..and u were doubting whether I'll be wearing it or not..Nah!! Tadaa!!

Went to KL after that. The old folks wanted to see the lantern thing in Bukit Jalil. So, here are some pictures I managed to capture.

The main attraction of the night. The 100 m long dragon latern which is made out of porcelain plates

 
KLCC lantern.

The hawk made out of CDs..

There were many stage shows..So many other displays..There were so many stalls selling stuffs from China..but I was too tired.

Thank goodness for Encarta Dictionary Tools installed into my Computer.
Now i know what a HIATUS means.
I didn't know a HIATAL is actually a word.
Do you know what a HIEROGLYPHIC is?..or a HIGS BOSON.?
or perhaps a HILUM?
or HILO, HILLY and a HIMALIA??
I was so engrossed in learning new words and suddenly when i saw HIBISCUS..I was wondering what kind of Greek word was that!!

I think my life's a practical joke at times.
When you don't want to something or someone, It, he, she tends to appear out of nowhere.
When you desperately want to know someone or something, it,he, she never turns up.
Hmm..
I have to apologise for being such an emo person.
and yes, Suet Mei, did I scare you in the car today.??
I was very quiet on the way home.
Did a lot of thinking but the damage done this time,..NIL..

I am so damn proud with myself.
I'm finally doing it,Yiling!Goh! Dai! Mei Ling!!

Hmm..

My cousin called me early this morning.He said the results were out.

I switched on my computer, keying all the details I vaguely remember, and I didn't get my results. Perhaps the financial department has hold my results, and I can't access to it

UTP is so money-minded!!

It's not like I am eager to know about my results. Just that everyone has the access to it and I do not. That's a bummer!~

I really ran out of vulgar words today.

I have been calling UTP the whole day. I called the Finance Department. The Exam Unit. I even called the Student Services. I wanted to know how I did in my finals.

I reached Uni at 4.30 p.m.Ran up to the Finance Department and asked whether I still owe the Uni any money. Confirmed none. Ran to the Exam Unit and I swear, UTP's clerks are all bitches. No, that was not a sweeping statement. Alright, Most of them. I went there, and saw them sitting around, obviously gossiping about something. I approached them POLITELY, asking them whether it was possible for me to check my results there. The lady said no results are out.

Huh?

I repeated clearly, just in case she didn't understand my English. She continued saying no, I can't check my results there. I was curious, because it was easy for them to do so because they have my database and with just a click of the mouse and a few data input, I am pretty sure, they are able to see my name plus everything about me and also my results. I asked the reason why. I told her that I purposely drove down to check with the Finance Department, and I purposely ran to the Exam Unit and all I get is what pathetic treatment from a clerk and a NO for an answer..?

and for Goodness sake..Let me tell you what answer i got in return.
" Sorry, you kena check online. Results itu sudah dipost online. Sekarang masa pejabat hampir habis, jadi semua computer sudah tutup.

Huh???~!!!!

The last time I checked my watch it was only 4.35 p.m.
So fast wanna switch off the computer??
Petronas no money wanna pay electricity bill meh? So they encourage the clerks to off their computers so early??
but how come the airconditioners are still on? The lights??

WTH man.

I walked away, and I was this close to throwing the bench at the counter. I drove so many Kilometers down and they didn't even bother to entertain me.What? You think it's Universiti PETRONAS, my dad gets free petrol isit? and the last time I checked, my car was still running on gas, not water.

I glared at her..and I said thank you. See? I was polite to that mean young bitch. Told ya, i forget easily and forgive her.. (NOT!)

Then i went back to the car, and consequently, Kwong Hoe called. He told me his results are not out also. He paid his tuition fees in advance but also the same thing. Aiting and Jiamin's were also like that. WTF. He told me he was directed from one department to another. He got fed up and scolded the clerks like mad.

In fact, I would always avoid calling UTP's hotline because I don't know where I would be directed to. In the end, I'll just hang up and drive there to settle my stuffs.

See? The management is such a pain. The only thing nice about this university,..Hmm..let me tell you once I figured that out.

Since the results for finals are out, all the UTP students have been calling me, suddenly popping chat rooms when I am online, asking me one question.

" How did you do? "

If I hadn't know better, I would have thought the kiasu-ism is back in action.Everyone must be comparing with one another,whether whose GPA has dropped or is maintained.Pinky told me that the guys are still high achievers..and girls,..being in an engineering University, are still behind..except for JiaMin who's still leading.

What about me?

Oh, the usual..As long as I think I have done my part, I guess, i can't really complain much, can I? Luckily when semester starts,which means I am officially in my degree year, everything would be reset to ZERO..even the CGPA. I guess, it's REALLY really the time to start anew now and start loving engineering.

I can't help repeating the same old thing everytime when a new semester begins.

No mamak.No more. Null.
24/7 in front of the books.
which means, i have to stop blogging for good.

I read Yen chiew's blog about her being contented with what makes her happy in her life. I promised that I will blog about happy stuffs at one point and I guess I have reached that point now.

What made me happy today?

1. Met up with Eewan and Euqueen today.Both came out just to accompany me for breakfast which was rare.

2. Got myself another photo album and it took me 2 hours to transfer the photos from the old album to the new one. Caught up with the past for a moment.

3. I finally realised that Engineering is not my thing after all.

4. Daddy is actually a superhero,-my superhero.
He did something today.For me.

5. Mum didn't bug me.

6. Tomorrow's a new day.

Oo boy. It's nice to do some self reflection once in a while.I hope i kept u entertained.

Daddy is cute.At his age.
I love you daddykins..!!~

Watched Pirates and the lalala..today with Yeesan, Michelle Lee and EuQueen.
The show was 2 and the half hours long.
Michelle Lee kept complaining of the duration because she was hungry.Hehhe.
I wonder why.
We had a very late breakfast, which was Pork Mee in Kam Hor, which serves one of the best 'Ju fun' in Ipoh. Need I say that Michelle Lee woke both me and Yeesan up for breakfast and i made it on time, ok, i was late for a couple of minutes.
After eating, we went to Jusco (again, for the dunno how many times this week;i lost count!)
Bought the tickets, and realised that Geraldine was in jusco too.
One thing, Ipoh people no go school, no go work one.
I went there for a couple of days, and yet the shopping complex is not empty at all.
You get to see many people, wheezing in and out..
How come they have the money to come shopping everyday geh??

What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

Been there.I guess it does make sense after all.

What is my warning label??

--I'm already missing my dad..sobs...

The original list has 25 people's name in it.
Guess how many turned up in the end?..
12..and not many stayed till the end.
What am I talking about?..
It was supposed to be a surprise party for Puiyeen who's going to leave to US next month. It was planned by the MichelleS and me..and the planning process was fun..Unfortunately,the plan didn't go as planned, because when Michelle Lee made reservations in Moven Peak, there were 6 tables ready for us.
We were left with only 2 in the end.
Nevertheless..we did have a nice dinner, plus the wonderful cake we bought for puiyeen..We managed to have a small little party compared to the big surprise party we have planned earlier.

PICTURES:--->

MichelleS [ Michelle Lee and Michelle Yew ]
-There was another Michelle Wong with us too..but she was our 2 years senior from MGS..I guess, MGS do breed alot of Michelles huh?

Karmun and I, before the party began.

Kwohau, PuiYeen and Raven.

Raven, and the MichelleS

The another Michelle and some guy..Both are Puiyeen's badminton mates..

 
Us :- MichelleS, Puiyeen, Euqueen, ME and Eewan from UK..not who you are thinking..

MeiLin and Angkhian

ME, Eewan and Euqueen..

US again..

Cheh Shing and Karmun came..but they had to leave early...Cheh Shing looks much girl-ier now..and everyone thinks that both me and Eewan ought to look the same too..Hehhe..I guess, next year perhaps, they will see us in heels?..
Hehhe...

It wasn't as how we pictured it would be. It ended up as some sort of a weekly get-together..I wonder when would be the next time we get to be together since everyone's leaving soon. And holidays do not fall on the same day except for Christmas and New Year's but then again, not many people would be flying all the way back.So, meeting again would perhaps be impossible.

Sometimes, it hurts to know that you make an effort to meet up but the other party does not feel like doing so.Haih, how can you be blamed for meeting new friends and forgetting old ones then?

Guess what I found when I finally clear my closet today..?

(front)

(back)

I found my class t-shirt lying somewhere in it..haha..and I wore it today when I went out yumcha with Eewan..Hehhe..I haven't been wearing that for such a long time already...=)

Lalalala....

So, 5Sc1 people, where's yours now?..

Khian, YOu are a good friend. You are not being appreciated. - FRIEND.

The thing about truth; It hurts. That's why we choose to lie.- line taken from Grey's Anatomy.

How true is that?..I mean..the reason why we always lie is because we fail to accept the truth..which often hurts. I lie, My parents lie, My friends lie, Everyone in this world lies to runaway..To runaway from reality..
The thing I like about Grey's Anatomy, is I learn alot. To see things in a different perspective..and it keeps me entertained for the past few nights..yoohoo...

What's with stalkers?
What's their problem?
Can't they leave their 'stalkee' alone??
Sucks when they start messing up your life..and if they can't get enough of that, they start messing up your friends' and your family's life..
What the fuck!..
Some people just can't stop and realise some fact in life.
*Goddamn it, just face the reality.*

One thing about not drinking after a long time, is that you start drinking again.Alone.

I bought myself a can of Heineken and I was hoping that I could enjoy that while watching Grey's Anatomy tonight. I updated my blog and yes, doing the usual thing, I started watching..I went to the refrigerator, saw that miserable can of Heineken, decided to go out and buy more. I started with a can of nice Heineken beer, ended up with 2 cans of Carlsberg and 1 nice can of Soda Cream. I was never addicted to alcohol, I just love drinking.

But then again, maybe drinking is not a good option,because when u have some alcohol in your blood streams, You tend to do alot of thinking; most of the thoughts are unnecessary. After my 2nd can, I went to took a cold shower, and that was when it was 2 in the morning. I was sobbing throughout my shower. Everything started rushing back into my braincells. Just couldn't stop having memories flowing back and I was being wayyy too emotional.

Alcohol is not good.

I went back to my series, started drinking the 3rd can. I wasn't really paying attention to what I was watching because all I could think of..was ONE thing.

--MP

I know most of you are going to say "What?!!Not again...!!" ..
But some things, we just couldn't help it.
Some things aren't just going to go away because we keep convincing ourselves that it's gone. Like I was saying in my previous entry about lying to runaway from the hurtful truth. Maybe I am running away.

Maybe I should stay away from alcohol.

Fascinating that while you are in the middle of getting a little drunk..or High for that matters, your brains still manage to function pretty well. You start remembering things which happened a long time ago. ( I probably should have done that when I was back in high school while doing History,eh? ) You start crying for no apparent reasons,yet knowing that crying won't do any good. You search frantically for your handphone,searching for the person's number, and typing text messages,telling how you feel and hoping that this person might change the decision made. Or perhaps, you think that after you wake up the next morning, everything was just a nightmare.

However, thank goodness I bought myself a can of Soda cream. I get to stop the flowing of alcohol and sorta neutralize it a little. I am not making any sense though because I am still recovering. One nice thing about Soda Cream; it wakes you up. You know that the alcohol made you type text messages which the person probably doesn't want to read them, and the Soda cream refrains you from sending those. Suddenly I have a better control over myself. Which explains why I am able to post this entry at this hour. 
Current time : 4 a.m

I know I am able to lie to everyone in this world about my recovery, but then the only person who I failed to lie to, is to myself. I can tell the whole world that I have moved on, with no strings attached, but I can't tell that to my heart.

Eewan was right. I was pretty pathetic to be drinking alone. I shouldn't have drink.I shouldn't have bought myself a can of Heineken. I shouldn't have went out in inappropriate hours to get myself more. I shouldn't have gave in. Most important of all, I shouldn't have lied to the whole world. I am sorry.

Again,as I have said, Alcohol is not good. 

Do you know what I hate most lately?..

Is to wait, wait and WAIT more. I am not exactly a patient person by the way, but seriously, how can someone be waiting for something all the time..? Even me, a gentle and kind person..can't even wait that long..

I do not understand why some people can just walk off and shrugs. For example, you set a date to meet up or you already plan to do something together, and you'll be sitting at home, waiting for him/her/them to call, pushing away all the plans for this, and all of a sudden, there was no call, no messages, no nothing!..and the whole damn day was wasted just for waiting, waiting and more waiting..Oo boy..ok, not only one who does this, but two, three and four and five,..and..!!!!

Isn't it better if you would at least have the courtesy to let me know that plans were cancelled last minute, or you have something better to do..So that,this at least spare me from waiting the whole day, because i have better things to do than WAIT.

Have to attend trial on the 27th. Means I have to come back to Ipoh on the 26th. and school's starting on the 24th. So many dates. and yes, currently I am waiting for the sentence.I wonder how much do I have to compensate. Dad said he might have to visit me in prison. Wahliao. I hope that doesn't come true, not after me watching Prison Break.
So many things in life, and this has to happen to me.

Told ya, some people just have it easy, I always have to struggle hard to have a decent life.I know I prayed for something exciting and interesting to happen in my life, but not this court thing and the accident and all. And certainly, i was not gifted with patience,but yet I was forced to wait, wait and WAIT.

Hold some responsibility, people. How much does a phone call or a sms cost now?.

What made me happy today..

As I was driving today, I passed by a certain place. I saw a girl,in her school uniform, I think she was about the age of 15-16..She had her school bag with her, and in her arms, was a few books..She was walking..under the hot sun, sweating profusely..I assumed that she had just finished her tuition class because from where she was walking from, stood a group of students, in their uniforms, waiting..It was already 4 something in the afternoon, and these people must be really tired after a long day. I glanced at the girl who was walking with her huge pile of books, and I saw a smile carved on her face. She was smiling, under the hot sun, with her (Heavy SCHOOL bag-which I assumed to be) and a stack of books in her arms.

How can someone, after such a long day, is still able to smile to herself under the hot sun?????

Not long after that, my brother who was sitting beside me said,
" Angkhian,(yes, he calls me that) ,why are you smiling to yourself?? Have you gone crazy??? "

Weird as it may sound, but soon after I saw the girl smiling to herself, I can't stop thinking about my life. She reminded me of my high school days,when I used to have a long day from school..with tuition classes everyday, with huge stacks of books in my arms..walking under the hot sun and all..I miss those days when I hurry from one tuition centre to another. The company I had in tuition classes was fun. Her huge stack of books reminds me when I was in form 3, I was called the walking library because everyday I have this pile of books in hand, to school and from school..Though I never use them.=)

I love being back in my teen years where I don't have to be responsible with my actions..I do not have to think of the consequences and all I had to do was to run to my parents and everything would be done for me. I do not have to worry about not having enough to spend, because if I don't have enough, I can always stay at home to have my meals..but now, if I have none, I really have none..

The girl who smiled to herself, reminded me all of this, even though I only had a glimpse of her. One mysterious thing about smiles, is that they are contagious. In this case, the smile spreaded to me.

=)

I have been listening to Orson's No Tomorrow since last night, having it play non stop on my lappy..My MUM thinks I am going bonkers listening to the same old tune playing all over again..I just love the catchy tune and also the lyrics..Hahha..Funny..

Let's go to a rave,
And behave like we're trippin'
Simply 'cause we're so in love.

Funny hats, shiny pants
All we need for some romance,
Go get dolled-up
And I'll pick you up.

There's no line for you and me
'Cause tonight we're V.I.P.
(I know somebody at the door).

I see that twinkle in your eye,
You shake that ass and I just die,
Let's check our coats and move out to the floor.

When I'm dancing with you
Tomorrow doesn't matter.
Turn that music up
'Till the windows start to shatter
'Cause you're the only one who can get me on my feet.
And I can't even dance.

Just look at me, Silly Me,
I'm as happy as can be-
I got a girl who thinks I rock.
And tomorrow there's no school,
So lets go drink some more Red Bull,
And not get home 'till about 6:00.

When I'm dancing with you
Tomorrow doesn't matter.
Turn that music up
'Till the windows start to shatter
'Cause you're the only one who can get me on my feet.
And I can't even dance.

Everybody here is staring
At the outfit that you're wearing
I love it when they check you out.
Cover's only twenty bucks,
And even if the dj sucks
It's time to turn this mutha out!

When we're together
When we're together
There's no tomorrow,
There's no tomorrow
When we're together
There's no one in the world
but you and me oh
you and me oh
You and me

-NIce Weh!!!!~wheee....

Met up with Lydia, Puiyeen, EuQueen, Kwong Hoe, Ying Tuan,VinShen and Eewan today.
The meeting place?.. At Butler's.
Just in case you have no idea where the place is, it's located opposite Parkson Grand, In front of the MBI..the 2 stalls which was built out of nowhere..
and honestly, like what Eu Queen said, we'd better try the food, because the chances of us going back, is ZERO. and even If someone were to give me a treat there, I don't even want to go back. The food there,..hmm..don't know what kind of food they served there actually and people actually have their lunches there..I wonder why...Eu Queen said the next time they come back to Malaysia, the stall might not even be there anymore.
Such a kidder, Eu Queen is.

I was pretty tired today. Went to see my lawyer and gave my part of the story. It has been a year ago and still they expect to remember every single detail. I don't have to attend the mention on the 27th. They are trying to settle it outside of the court and if it doesn't work that way, I'll have to attend the trial. I really am not keen with the idea of having to go through this hassle of going to court, since Holidays are ending soon and I certainly don't want to take a day off to come back..I mean, since it's my first year in degree and all, I really don't want to skip any lectures, labs and tutorials.

Fetched Pui Yeen and Euqueen back to MGS today to collect our SPM cert and 1119 cert.Lydia was terrified to sit in my car..Hmmph, had no confidence in my driving skills..Only Eewan was so confident enough that she didn't put on her seat belts. =)

I do miss school a lot.Being in High school..so carefree..and I don't have to arrange my own timetable..and trust me, it's not as interesting as it sounds, because arranging your own timetable can be a headache.Looking at my master timetable and then having to fit everything into a week, is not easy at all.When we were still in school, everything was there..All we had to do was pack our books according to the timetable and we are all set to go.Now, ..Now..i DON'T even understand my master timetable.!!!How can I even arrange my own..

I wonder how MP's doing.A random thought.

All i wanted was some understanding from my parents, my family, my friends..
Maybe I was not meant to be who I am now..I felt comfortable with who I am with, what clothes I wear, the way I present myself.
Many thinks that I am abnormal because HE gave me a life as a girl but I always dresses up like the opposite.I am confortable in guy's wear..i mean, not entirely but I prefer wearing shorts and shirt whenever I go out..and unlike other girls who wear thick make ups and dresses up as if going for a ball...I am just not that type of girl which i think my mum wants me to be.

Today, we had the usual argument again about me not able to be a girl-ier girl which she's expected me to be. She said I was over my teenage years, and should be changing by now. I am reaching my early 20's and I am still comfortable with how I look. Do I even care about how the society looks upon me? -one of her typical questions. Sometimes I felt useless and helpless, because I can't bring myself to change like how they want me to do so. I am not brave enough to change my outlook, fearing how people would see me. The society has been comfortable with how I looked and prolly accepted it, but mum is never satisfied. She thinks that her little girl ought to be wearing skirts all the time, with heels..Which means, no more long pants, shorts, and shirts..No more sport shoes whenever I hang out with them.

But I know I won't be happy with the sudden changes. I don't feel comfortable in them. I tried changing but I feel weird. Mum has been comparing me with my other friends who already matured..wearing makeups and all..I felt pressurized..I know I have disappointed her but yet, can I do something just for the sake of pleasing her?

Since young, I know I was meant to be like how the girls are meant to be now. I like the things which guys do. I like to do things which the guys do. The only reason why I am hanging out with more girls than guys is because I come from an all girls' school. Sometimes, I felt trapped. At times I am not as guyish, I am just a normal girl who feels comfortable in guys' wear..or let me put in this way, a normal girl who has yet to be ready for girl-ish stuffs..

I am so confused...I feel like a fool..I want to change but I am not ready. I have no balls to change..

I have been to Starbucks for the 3rd time this month. I think they should be thankful that 'fools' like us, spend our money there. However, today was slightly different. Puiyeen suggested to meet up since today would be the last day for Eu Queen to be here in Ipoh before leaving to Australia. I think Starbucks in Ipoh is much costly than the ones in KL..erm..mum reckoned it's the same..but i still think it's not worthy to pay that much here..Sigh..I should probably stick to Oldtown Kopitiam..Cheaper..Hehhe..3 times a month there! can really kill my wallet..

Got myself a new pair of sneakers today. My 3rd pair this year..Hehhe..Mum still thinks I need to get myself a pair of heels instead..SIGH.i thought the issue would end last night, but..but..it continued again when she was in my car. Arrgh! I could not just drop her by the roadside,right?..Sigh, and she chose a right timing, because I can't walk away from her. darn!

Will be leaving to UTP tomorrow and clean my new room. Did I mention we'll be moving into a new building and the deco and stuffs are new and nice..really really really..!!For real!! ~whee!!...but one thing..my house is located on the 5th level, so a lot of stairs climbing..till i graduate..=)

I am so tired that i freaking want a massage chair to be send to my house now.
That is how tired I am.
Ok, I went back to UTP just now, to drop my stuffs and to clean my room.
Since Punchee isn't back yet, my mum asked me to get my grandma's maid to go along and to clean the room for me instead.
~No, I am not a pampered child, I am just loved!!(don't jealous la weh?)

So, I carried one of my luggage bags, held a few plastic bags with things inside, started walking up the fleet of stairs. Reaching the 3rd floor, I was already starting to have difficulty to breathe. I started to pant a lil and continued walking anyway. I reached the 5th floor, with my back full of sweat and I was glad that I didn't have to clean my room at all. I left it to the maid to do her magic and soon enough, 15 minutes later, the room was clean, sparkle clean!!..I went down to carry my remaining stuffs and unload it.

Right now, I am in Ipoh because I don't want to stay in the room alone tonight. And I still want to spend more time in Ipoh, have more chinese food, and my comfy bed. Oh shoot!~ I forgot to capture some pics of my new room.Everything's new, ranging from the study desk, the bed, the mattress, and the wardrobe. We have a fridge in our house, and also a nice dining table.

Speaking of which, I am going to hold a house meeting tomorrow with the other housemates. Gonna lay down the do's and don'ts in the house,to avoid any repetition of the 13th May incident in UTP.

Dad told me that there was some issues lately in universities..err..UPM?..Hmm..racial issues are never gonna end in this country,hard to get along..Hate to admit but yes, we have gotta face the fact that the same colours are better off staying close to one another. I don't know what you think, and some of you may disagree with what I have said. But being in NS, i know what it's like to mingle around with different races and people. However, things would be much comfortable with the same type of people close by.

Not to say that I have no other races people as friends. For instance, Dai,one of the wackos, izzati, balraj, premilla, elangesh, and what's his girlfriend's name?..err..shamini, jaytar..etc..I can't name the others..but I have loadsa friends who are not chinese..Ok, Dai and Izatti don't count because we grew up together and i believe both of them understands chinese very well.. Sometimes I even converse with them in cantonese and they understand me perfectly well. But the point is, no matter how many friends who are non-chinese I have, they would also prefer hanging out with their own click of friends. Not because they don't like hanging around with ME, but because they feel comfortable, like how I feel,being around a chinese group of friends in Uni.
We do hang around, but in a minimal time in school. However, my theory doesn't apply to all because there are a few people who enjoys the company of other races..

It's just up to one's self to choose their company. Colours should never be a problem or even an issue to debate about.
*Don't worry, dai!!..

If i made any mistakes in whatever I have written or created some issues,i apologise as I am in a tired state and I probably have no idea what i have just written. Do leave me a message on the tagboard if you disagree or just to let me know,that I have written something wrongly.

Thank you.

I am watching Teens Choice Award..on a Saturday night..
How pathetic can my life be? And today's supposed to be my last Saturday holiday night.
Sobs...

Going back to uni in 20 minutes time.
Dreadful...and for the first time, I don't want to return to that beautiful place.
I know it's going to be a hectic semester with Rotaract and all..
and I am finally doing something engineering,that freaks me out.
And then the food..- I have no idea what I am going to eat tonight for dinner.
In fact, i have no idea what I am going to eat next whole week.
I'll always come back during the weekends, coz I am missing homecooked food already.

There will be no connection in the new building. Which explains my absence the whole of next week..Which means there will be no 312443231 entries in your friends' page..
Ok, do not miss me.

It was hard..
It was difficult..
It really took me a lot of effort to have not write for the past one week.
Ok, partly because there was no internet connection in my room..YET.

I am only back for the weekend.
I feel so totally happy about this for the first time.
The only bad thing about this is that the weekend is so short.

I only survived with Maggi Mee, white porridge and biscuits for the past one week.
We did have a cooking session together on Wednesday and it was yum-yum..
But other than that, I was practically surviving on mostly MSGs..
Sigh.
It's not like there's no cafeteria in my campus, Yes we do have..in fact, we have 7 of them but the one nearest to my hostel serves no food.
No food as in the food, cannot eat one lah!
The one which I used to go to, is like..errr...so far away...it's like from MGS, wanna walk to super kinta la..
(that far apart you know?)
And I am currently placed on the 5th floor, which means, it takes a lot of energy to either walk down from the place, and more energy to walk up to my place.
So, in the end, I would just forgo the idea of walking anywhere and stayed at home, eating anything which requires no cooking and quick.
I am not lazy but if I do cook, it means I am really desperate to eat already!

Lectures have already started. Labs and Tutorials are not yet started.
But, I already felt tired and exhausted walking to classes everyday.
Imagine having to arrive in your class, sweating non-stop and then, having to listen to the lecturers talking about something which you have no idea about..but yet u can't just walk away,because that day,you might suddenly have a pop quiz out of the blue..
That was what happened in my Statics class on the 3rd class of the week.
Only the first week and the lecturer's already giving us hell.
and Statics was nowhere as easy as 1,2,3 ok?
and she said, "The thing about pop quizzes, it pops out of nowhere.!"

Labs and tutorials will begin next week, which means walking more to everywhere.
Imagine we have to rush to one class after the other..
That was one day when 3 of us were late for class, and we had to run from the library to the class which was err...VERY FAR APART..(no kidding,k?)
It was from IRC to POCKET C, man...

Other than classes,and no internet connection in my room, and no consumption of decent food, basically everything is still fine as it is..
Oh yeah, the first week of uni, people are already starting to study..like really hard..REALLY fucking hard..and people are seen hanging out in the library...
like wtf weh????

Alright la..I think I really love holidays more now..

Spend my whole Saturday shopping in Parade and Tesco today.
I believe of supporting the idea of MEGASALES ok?
I am already planning to go KL before it ends..so, must save money.Another reason for me to stay close to MAGGI mee...hehe..

but today when I was turning out from a junction to the main road, this fucking man..driving a proton saga, which was on my left,turned into my lane..and I was fucking knocked again..IDIOT..
the one fucking coward did was, looked at me, and then when I stopped my car aside, he fucking drove off without even looking at me..
WHAT THE FUCKING HELL??????!!!!
i was so pissed+ SHOCKED+ scared..and continued picking up my brother while scolding him because he was PARTIALLY the cause why I was there in the first place..
I drove off, parked the car somewhere safe and went to see my car..
It had a little dent..Awful scratch and it was obvious and my brother dare to tell me that it's not even noticable..
I called dad instantly..but all he said was, "Sigh, you called me for what?dented mai dented lor..."
Sigh..speaking of being supportive..
I was alil shocked throughout the jouney back..and when tzeyang, punchee was worried..Kept calling to ask about my condition..
=)
and now to let my mum knows..(she still don't know, because she's not at home for the weekend..)

DIElar...the fucking man..i am so gonna cursed him..and he had the nerve to run off..[oklar, I would also do the same] but he knocked MY car!!!!

Dad asked me what time do I wished to go back to UTP today..
I told him I don't want to go back.
He said I must grow up already, must leave the nest..
I said I don't want to grow up so fast, I don't want to leave the nest, plus I don't have feathers yet..
He said, put 'feather tonic!'

My dad can be a kidder sometimes.

Back to my point, I didn't like the idea of going back to tronoh, although it's only a 20 minute drive away.
I don't want to go back to maggi Mee, I don't want to have biscuits for lunch, I don't want to wake up,dress up and walk all the way to classes..

I don't want-la!!..sobs...

Being officially in undergraduate studies,means I get to see my other friends lesser..like the ones in EE department..the only time we get to meet one another is while walking to classes and we only managed to meet up on the way..
Or while waiting for classes to begin, we would be hanging out in 'INTOEAT' cafe in Pocket D..
But I really missed hanging out with the usual group...

Sigh..

I guess I will have to start packing up..Dad kept asking me to go back..Cruel man!!..=(

So,it's another week then.